Something you don't usually see while enjoying shaschlick!

Normally I am not a supporter of mass update emails being sent more often than once a month, maybe once every two weeks, but twice in two weeks I consider to be bad form.  In this particular case, however, the events I witnessed last Friday night during dinner necessitates the bending of the the email update quota rule - if for no other reason simply because I need to tell this story before my memory fades.

So there I was, at dinner, with my friends Marko and Tatiana.  We were sitting outside at Cafe Sad, in Hermitage Park, enjoying some tasty shaschlick.  For those of you who don't know, shaschlick is this wonderful kabob like food.  It's originally from Central Asia but extremely popular all over Russia.   It's basically these hunks of meet skewered and grilled to perfection then served with some fresh veggies and flat bread (and beer/vodka if your taking).  It's definitely my favorite form of Russian meat, mostly cause it's not boiled.  There is, however a downside to shaschlick.  The the slow grilling of the schaschlick leaves the meat tender and tasty but it doesn't always kill all of the bacteria, which can lead to some rather serious bouts of food poisoning as my brother, also a fan of the shaschlick, can attest to from his experiences in Turkmenistan. 

Getting back to the story...  It was a beautiful evening in downtown Moscow.  It was around midnight and darkness had finally settled upon the city.  The temperature was pleasant but growing just chilly enough for Tanya to request a blanket from the waitress.   Let me pause of another tangent here - almost all outdoor cafes in Russia have a stock of fleece blankets that they bring out and wrap around the customers upon request.  It's a great way to enjoy the evening and stay warm.  It's especially nice at a place like Cafe Sad where they have lounging couches.  You can stay up late eating, drinking and lounging all in the comfort of your very own blanket.

Okay, really getting back to the story...so there we were enjoying our meal when I decided to head over to the facilities.  While standing in line for the restroom I started looking out the window and to my surprise I spotted what looked to be a naked man in park's main fountain.  Startled, I blurted out in English "Is there a naked man in the fountain?"  The two Russian women standing next to me looked at me funny so I just pointed out the window.   I stood there for a few moments trying to squint through the darkness to see if what I thought I was seeing was really what I was seeing.

As I left the rest room I decided to go take a closer look at the fountain.  As I approached the fountain I realized, much to my surprise, that I had been incorrect.  There was not a naked man in the fountain, but two drunk naked Russian men splashing around in the park's small fountain.  The first, a skinny fellow, was frolicking in the bottom basis, a large hot tub like part of the fountain.  The second a much larger gent had climbed into the upper, bird bath like, basin of the fountain and was scrunched in enjoying a vodka and a beer. 

The sight of the two bathers attracted quite a crowd of fellow gauwkers and amateur photographers.   The growing crowd and din of laughter drew the the friendly neighborhood security guard who began yelling at the two men and telling them to get out of the fountain. 
Our hero bathers, however were not deterred they nobly stood their ground and responded to the guard's harassment by lighting up their cigarettes and mocking the guard.  Now it takes some serious confidence (or serious inebriation) to mock anyone while sitting scrunched up naked in fountain.  But, apparently, these guys had either the confidence or the right blood alcohol level to pull it off. 

I'm not exactly sure what the guys in the fountain said but it was apparently funny as the crowd was rolling with laughter.  Finally, the guard left, tail tucked between his legs.   I think he was discouraged by his failure to enforce his position of authority and embarrassed by the laughing crowd.  At this point, however, the whole scene was becoming a bit dull (old hat you might say) so I headed back to my table to share my experience with Marko and Tanya and finish my dinner.  From our table we could see the two men finally emerge from the pond.  Thankfully we were far enough away not to be able to see more than the glow of their bare asses as they strutted around the fountain talking, stretching and generally delaying the dressing process as long as humanly possible.

So that was my humorously disturbing Friday night in Moscow.  I hope you enjoyed the story and to get a real flavor of the fun (IE the snapshots) go to http://picasaweb.google.com/mpadraicmurphy and click on the album titled "A disturbing dinner 6.22.07."

Happy viewing.

Mike