Welcome to the Jungle

Iquitos Travel Blog

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Hanging around

So I booked my tour with Del Monte - better the devil you know and all that. As I turned up on the morning he informed me we were waiting for a girl who would be coming along too. Swee-heet.

Not so sweet. And not so girl.

After the Lima experience I was perhaps a bit paranoid, but the girl that turned up had a fair few not so feminine features: big jaw, big hands, five ‘o’clock shadow, strapping shoulders (though no real waist or arse) and a high neck top that seemed to contain large, but bizarrely shaped breasts that suspiciously provided no cleavage view in the cut out section.

On top of this she was from Arequipa and could talk for Peru so the start of the tour was just her talking Spanish, with the guide squeezing an odd Spanish word in when she paused for breath.

Vultures
Smashing.

We took a Motorcarro to the Port - not that spacious since all three of us were sat with our legs apart to avoid ball squashage. The one woman Spanish talkshow continued, punctuated with brief questions to me in English - primarily focused on my career and marital status…

Next was a trip down the Amazon on a small speed boat. The highlight of the journey was when a paper napkin blew into my face - I turned to see the source - various other napkins were escaping from the cut out cleavage bit of Manfred Mann’s top. S-He laughed, tucked them back in then carried on rattling away in Spanish.

Thankfully when we arrived at our destination it turned out that Manfred was only on a day trip, so disappeared into the forest with a young local boy (cribbins!) whilst me and my guide, Larry, made our way through the forest to the Jungle Lodge.

Sunset
The lodge had about forty rooms, although only one was occupied - mine. Spice-world.

After I’d settled in then we headed out for a walkabout in the jungle for a few hours, stopping at a local animal rescue centre on the way.

I thought back about the kitten, Manchos, that attacked me every morning, the forty or fifty stray dogs that I passed every day in Iquitos, the vampire bats that I had seen on occasion and more immediately the monkey that was chewing my elbow whilst shagging my thigh. My past words reverberated in my head, “No, I’ll not bother with the rabies injections - it’s not like I’m really going to be in contact with any animals…”

The evil monkey had a proverbial (and literal) hard-on for me, so I spent a lot of the time at the animal sanctuary furtively looking over my shoulder to spot the next molestation, or making sure that I positioned Larry, or another monkey between me and my predator.

Evil small monkey

Overall the walk was hugely enjoyable despite the lack of participants. I learnt a lot about the lives of the villagers in the Amazon, as well as the local flora, fauna and animals. One example being that if you smash a hole in a red termites nest, put your hand over it until you have a termite sleeve then squish them all in it makes a highly effective mosquito repellent. Plus it doesn’t burn like DEET. Unless you do it with black termites, when it will hurt a hell of a lot more.

Finally I went for a little wander by myself at sunset, which was incredibly beautiful. The nature of the Amazon was a lot more enjoyable than the grubby city of Iquitos.

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Hanging around
Hanging around
Vultures
Vultures
Sunset
Sunset
Evil small monkey
Evil small monkey
Iquitos
photo by: Ileamel