Chim Chim Charoo

Kangaroo Island Travel Blog

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Kairoo and Lorraine
All this week I've come home covered in soot. I've been very tempted to dance around like an idiot and sing that chimney sweep song from Mary Poppins, but i have refrained for Bob and Lorraine's sake. They'd surely banish me to the caravan for something like that. I suppose i should explain why i come home sooted everyday; man, you people are so demanding.

Explanation ready go:
Bob has an area of land from the garden to the river covered in scrub (bushes) and dead trees (dead trees). My professional tractor mowing skills (okay really i've knocked over 4 fence posts, a tree Bob wanted to keep, and i've broken the tractor at least twice) took care of most of the scrub, but we can't mow trees (well big ones anyway, right Bob? heh heh.
Kairoo posing
...hehhh) and logs so...burn baby, burn. It's not that easy though; we have to burn, push all the leftovers together, burn some more, wash, rinse, get the idea. Trees take forever to burn off, so it's seemingly endless, hence bryan the chimney sweep.
Chim Chim Charoo.

The weather here has been long as the sun is up. When the sun is not up it is freezing. The pipes froze yesterday for the first time ever. Bob and Lorraine rightfully blamed me. Nasty americans are always bringing bad weather with them. Now, when the sun is shining, which it usually is once it decides to say hello, the temps are in the 60's and 70's. Sounds delightful doesn't it? It's not. Southern Australia is in the middle of a drought. This is the rainy season, but apparently mother nature didn't get the memo.
Kairoo and Tammy. They look innocent and sweet, but I'm pretty sure one of them pooped in my shoe.
So every time i take a shower i feel very evil. I've only taken 3 showers since i've been here. E-V-I-L times 3.

Note: there's nothing exciting in this entry so you should definitely keep reading.

Bryan vs. The Ants
Round 1:
Lorraine left me some Lifesavers candy on my bed as a welcoming gift, mmmmmm! I ate a few, left them on the counter, went for a walk, and returned to find a pile of Ant-Savers where my candy had been. You win this round, Ants, but i'll have you know that i will not go softly into that good night. Since then i wash every dish thoroughly and never leave so much as a crumb from my morning feast of toast and jam to tempt them. Victory was surely mine, but i could feel them always nearby, waiting for me to make a careless mistake.
Tree goats. "Man, we totally shoulda been giraffes." nyuk nyuk

Round 2: the careless mistake
I noticed a few ants in my trash just hangin' out, so i tied it up and set it by the door to go out to the "Rubbish Bin" (which i found out today does not exist). I returned from working on friday to find the Queen Ant had been assembling an army in the trash bag. They had already begun their attack, marching along the crevices in the walls and counter tops. They had ambushed the microwave and were flanking the appliances were doomed and defenseless! I scrambled through cabinets searching for cleaner, bleach, air freshener, any weapon that comes in a spray bottle. Toothbrush? No. Waffle iron? No time for waffles you fool; this is war! Ah hah! My salvation is found...prepare to meet your demise, Ants! One fell swoop of proverbial insect napalm and the wall crevices are turned into a black-speckled graveyard.

What sort of super weapon could inflict such efficient death? What miracle of human ingenuity could possibly produce this nearly instant victory?!
...insect spray. duh.

So as we roll into the weekend i'll leave you with a bit of Australian terminology, ie funny names for everyday things. I know, i know, you feel ripped off...crap for pictures, a glorified insect problem thrown in as filler, and now i'm giving you a glossary. You have every right to protest. But do not fret my friends! Rachel, Lorraine's grand daughter, and Anthony, guy who's working for Rachel's dad, are taking me spear fishing on Saturday! so many painful things could happen to me! I can tell you're excited about the possibilities. As am i. To bryan's impending misfortune!


boot - trunk of a car
bonnet - hood of a car
windscreen - windshield
biscuit - cookie (try to explain to an australian what it is WE call a biscuit and you will only get blank faces)
lolli - any sort of hard candy
jumper - sweatshirt, sweater, fleece, etc.
chook - chicken
buoy (pronounced "boy") - buoy (pronounced booey)

That's all i can think of right now...
rheagirl says:
hahaha.. this blog is so funny! i enjoyed reading. :0)
Posted on: Aug 28, 2009
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Kairoo and Lorraine
Kairoo and Lorraine
Kairoo posing
Kairoo posing
Kairoo and Tammy. They look innoce…
Kairoo and Tammy. They look innoc…
Tree goats. Man, we totally shoul…
Tree goats. "Man, we totally shou…
Kangaroo Island
photo by: Biedjee