Why do I do it?... Journal Entry #1.

Fond du Lac Travel Blog

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Why Ireland? Why anywhere?
With the amount of money I plan to save, some may wonder why I'd choose to "blow" it on a random trip to Ireland, and with good reason. I could do something reasonable, like save up for future endeavors, emergency bills, charity, etc. I guess that would make sense. Yeah, this journal entry is already turning to a complete disaster. We can try to blame that partly on the dimly lit room, the television on, the three adults--who aren't me--watching it (American Idol... hmmm, added distraction), the two children at the table with me, and the 3mo old kitten sleeping soundly on my notebook... that is, the notebook on which I'm attempting to record my thoughts before transferring it to electronic media of sorts. I anticipate in my tavels, however, that I won't always have a quiet room in which to write!

Anyway, a lot of people have asked me why I suddenly decided to take a trip to Ireland. Truth is, this isn't a sudden decision. My entire life has been one giant itch to get out of the house, out of the city, off the road. It seems to me that my cat is more interested in my writing than I am. Which has lead me far away from any point I could have possibly made, and left me stranded without the hope for a successful segway back to my original subject matter... sigh... kittens... I need some ice cream. Mint chip.

All right... travelling. I can't say what it is. It's like I'm constantly feeling homesick for places that aren't familiar... does that make sense? I'm currently in the process of moving for the 4th time in 9 months. That's disgusting, and ridiculous. I hate moving--I hate feeling nomadic. So, it's strange to me that I'd feel a perpetual need for adventure and exploration. I want so much to be settled, and have a place to realize myself and my goals, but at the same time I feel trapped by the reality that I have to work. I have to go to school. I have to pay bills. I have to be this, and this, and this. I have to be near my family. With my dad's newly discovered, yet rapidly progressing illness, I don't have the option to be away from them for an extended period of time. Which sucks, but I've learned the difficult way that Alzheimer's is neither pleasant nor forgiving. I guess I want to travel to gain a sense of control over everything? Does that make any sense? I don't want a set itinerary. I don't want to be tied down by my obsession with money (and saving it)... I don't mean to sound like a tightwad. I hate money, truly. But frugality has become to prevalent in my life, it's literally become one of the most important things in my life. I can control my bank account, for the most part. Without control, I go crazy. Maybe my plans to travel the world, to hike the American Discovery Trail, to go to Mars, to be President, to write a book, to live in the wilderness, to learn every language known to man... perhaps it's all some desperate attempt to gain some control.

And with that, I'm going to Ireland this summer. I chose the Republic of Ireland because of a nameless fascination I have with it. My family is from Northern Ireland, so that's somewhat irrelavent--regardless. Three jobs and five months from now, Ireland will know me... and I shall know its beautiful countryside!

canuck_downunder05 says:
I hear ya! I don't seem to belong where I'm at, and yet everywhere I go, the shoe always seems to fit a little to big, or a little to small...Anyways I hope Ireland is the begining of a long journey full of many experiences and stepping stones that will eventually lead you to the place you belong! Atleast that's what I'm hoping for. LOL Best of Luck!
Posted on: Feb 20, 2009
gregbales says:
congrats go for the both of us I wish I could go.
Posted on: Feb 11, 2009
homeres says:
Go for it! I was in Dublin last year and had a blast! Follow your dreams!
Posted on: Jan 21, 2009
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