From Melbourne To Perth across Nullabor Plain
Melbourne to Perth ( Nullabor) September 1st 2007
Hey there Melbournians, I promised an email so here goes.
On the start of my journey the drive was easy, going through Horsham and
plenty of country towns, at this stage I thought I was out whoop whoop but
little did I know what was to come. The first town I arrived in was Port
Augusta which had a disgusting smell when I was driving though, what was
this? I had a look to the right and there was a big pool of shit where the
sewerage all leads to, how they can live in this I do not know, all you see
in this place are Aborigines, aborigines, and more aborigines all driving old
Commodore station wagons.
had a rotten tasting bacon and eggs and was in hysterics when a scrubber
walked through the door and asked for a CAPPA WITH 5 SUGARS. Then handed the
lady a wad of 5 cent pieces.
Next I was on the Nullarbor there was so much anticipation, for what?
Nothingness.....long straight flat plains of desert. Good drive though very hard to explain how such a drive can
be a good drive, I think it’s a sense of achievement when people drive past
and give you a wave because we are all doing the same thing, one tip though
if you ever do it don’t bother waving to the truckies or people with
caravans, they give you doughnuts. You feel like a bit of a tosser when they
don’t wave back, lol. I also saw a guy riding across it, that's right riding
all the bloody way across the Nullabor, that is what I call dedication,
with a backpack on his back.
happily, until a very bad incident happened, the OLD MAP that was given to
me was outdated and a roadhouse that was on here was now shut down, with
under a quarter tank and 90kms to Nullabor which I didn’t even know had a
roadhouse? Shitting bricks I summed up my options whether to write on my
boogie board saying “need fuel” hoping that someone had a jerry can or just take a
punt and hope the Nullabor had fuel, luck hasn’t been my way the past few
years so I thought the man upstairs owed me one this time, stuff it I went
for it and the happiest moment of my life was when I saw a roadhouse in the
distance, happiest man on earth. 90 ks of shitting bricks!
I then went across the border and stopped at a place called Mundrabilla
where a dwarf woman on the desk happily gave me a room.
shower had a trampoline floor; the pool was empty and looked identical to
the scene out of Con Air where Garlen Green is singing a song, the lamp above
my head sounded like it was about to explode while I was reading, I didn’t
take the risk I already had my luck today I turned it off and went to sleep.
I was happy to get out there the next day I ran over a brown snake and saw plenty
of tailless lizards, emu, wombats, eagles, hawks and that was the end of the
Nullabor.
I then arrived in Coolgardie which was a massive dive and had more Abos’ than
Port Augusta, I found a place which was worse than Mundrabilla believe it or
not. The guy at reception had a dead fly the size of a cockroach sitting
next to his biscuit which was disgusting.
things until the wind blew the door shut, dam I locked my keys in the house,
I went back to get a spare and it didn’t work, he came down and tried it and
told me that the worker that had marked the keys who couldn’t read or write so he
put a nine as a six. I was staying in room six so he had to go back and grab
the spare for room 9. Very amusing. When I went to bed the bed was spring
loaded and when I lay in it it folded and basically ate me whole. I put the
mattress on the floor and slept on the floor. I watched the T.V for a while
and saw a mate from School is now a host for the WA channel 9 news, what a
coincidence.
Anyways that enough typing for me there is good surf out the front so I will
be on my way......... Cya
