Vietnam Travel Blog› entry 1 of 1 › view all entries
Something we've noticed in quite a few places we've stayed or visited, is the writing of graffiti on the walls of hostels and bars by some travellers. As you sit there enjoying your drink you can't help but be drawn to read the inane drivel some people have have felt compelled to write. The graffiti tends to fall into one of several categories. First there are sports or national bravado. One particular favourite appeared in the DMZ Bar in Hue, Vietnam which is practically covered in the stuff. There in big black marker pens was the nugget of opinion that, and we quote; "LIVREPOOL(sic) O.K." To the fan who wrote this we would point out that 'livre' is French for book and perhaps if you'd opened a few more of them and a few less bottle or cans of beer you wouldn't have made the mistake. If that sounds patronising then we'd just say the old Jimmy Carr line 'don't worry your little head about it'. Now it's bad enough that this particular moronic sportsfan can't actually spell Liverpool correctly, but surely if you are going to write sports graffiti the idea is to convey that yours is the best team in the universe not 'OK'. To this end, and we think it was in the same bar, you have to admire the belief of the fan who scrawled; "YEOVIL R THE GREATEST EVER". Now we know a Yoevil Town fan and even he wouldn't go that far. (Hi, Darren - named and shamed!).
A second category is the pearls of wisdom that some people feel compelled to pass on. Our favourite in this category can be seen on a wall in Pogo Bar in Mui Ne, Vietnam, and again we quote; "STONES ARE THE EMBRYOES (sic) OF THE EARTH". What does that even mean? Again with the spelling mistake so maybe the common theme here is the level of alcohol consumption which we'll get on to. Whilst we're sure there are lots of competing theories as to the Earth's creation we're not convinced that many people truly believe we popped out of an embryonic rock from some other place!! Space dust gathering around the gravitational pull of the sun and our galaxy.....maybe, creationists.....yeah sure!! Stone embryos.....ok then, now we all know!!
A third and possibly the worst are the egotistical dumbasses who want to forever record their visit by recording their names. Again one of the worst we have seen in this category was in Mui Ne where a group of kitesurfers (which kind of conjures up the image already) not only recorded their names, they drew a little cartoon of them mooning the world and gave themselves nicknames such as "FLYBOY" and "CUTIE" or some equally nauseating rubbish. You're all very, very sad.
Fourth, there was the warning in a hostel in Xian, China which read "DON'T GO TO THE RESTAURANT WITH THE WOODEN FRONT TO THE LEFT OF THE HOSTEL. IT'S EXPENSIVE AND THE STAFF AREN'T FRIENDLY". Not sure where this person was from but they've pretty much described every single restaurant in London with that one. We could understand if it was, 'Don't go to the restaurant at such and such as I ate there and was hospitalised with food poisoning and ended up on a drip for a week!', but expensive and not very friendly staff. It doesn't sound like you're a bundle of fun buddy and you've just flown all the way to China so you're not short of a penny or two. Read the menu before you order and the price won't be a surprise will it!!
Finally there are the inspirational quotes which have clearly been written by some first year uni student taking a year out to travel. A common example is the Gandhi quote "BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD", except that little Holly or Johnny on their travels don't think the rest of us will have had the benefit of their university education and will not recognise it as a Gandhi quote, so they proudly put their name and where they're from as though they wrote it.
One more thing troubles us. How do these deluded lunatics go about writing this drivel? Do they approach the staff of the bar and ask for a marker pen? Do they carry their own pen everywhere just waiting for the inspiration and opportunity to write something down? Please if you see one about to do it, for their own sake stop them! Perhaps it's just us being cynical and spiteful about these peoples naivety but then surely it's better to be cynical than naive. Wait a minute maybe we should write that on a wall somewhere!!!!