AsiaMacau

Sayonara Siam

Macau Travel Blog

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time to go now

It had been six months of bedazzlement in Thailand but now it was time to break free from the enchantment and leave. It was now or never for me as I was drifting more and more into a stupor of magic wine. Years would pass as days and I would rouse to find my ship buried in the sand. I often felt as if in love but it wasn’t just her it was She the land that was love bombing me.

I had made a definite decision to go anywhere far away from here. A chance meeting with a Romanian woman decided my next destination. She was on a sabbatical visiting the centers in Thailand. Everywhere she went she did a pitch for her homeland. “Come to Romania! It’s so beautiful!” she would exclaim loudly showing photographs, “the women are lovely.” “Is this long after WW2?” people would ask as they saw the desperate and shabby looking East Europeans. I didn’t really give it much thought listening to her spiel and saw her pictures of post-communist greyness. Besides she wasn’t attractive at all and her personality was quite wacky. However now with little alternatives at the moment I decided to take her up on her offer. Without money to gamble with I take my chances with life. Romania seemed like a bleak prospect at best. ‘At any rate it’s a good place to get lost for a while’ I figured, now explain to Sai. 

Naturally she didn’t take it very well. “But what is so hard about staying?” “That’s just it, its too easy to stay here!” I tried vainly to explain my stoical Japanese ideals, “A man has to make sacrifices to enrich his character…” To a culture seeped in pleasure these ideals of manliness seemed almost Martian, she was very confused. “I’m making a lot of major decisions in my life now. I’m having a spiritual change…” I had made a conscious effort to dedicate my life more, “I just can’t grow in the ways I need to here..” I had seen signs of what I felt was compromise and man-pleasing in the grassroots of the organization and corruption and misguided direction by the administration. There was discontent but at the same time the status quo was maintained through intrigue and disenfranchisement. Maybe it was just paranoia but when there is a hint of misbalance alarm bells start ringing in my head. I didn’t want to be part of it, to stay would mean having to start making little steps on the path to compromise for gain and in the end I would lose it all. Of course this was all to much for her to comprehend. “I don’t want you to go!” she said grasping on to my legs as I sat at the computer. It was a touching gesture (made me feel like demi-god or something) to have her throwing herself at my feet but I had to be true to myself. I turned and continued my google search for cheap flights to Europe.

I thought about this incident and others at the newly built Bangkok Airport. There was around half an hour left for me in the Kingdom. Just earlier the immigration officer noticed I had overstayed a day on my visa. Because of that I had chosen this pretty young female officer to pass through. “Oh, I’m really sorry” I smiled my sweetest. “Oh..that’s alright” she cooed “Just remember not to do it again.” “Kop kun mahk! I will” I pulled of one of my graceful wais.  “Come again to Thailand” she coyly invited. Now waiting to board my mind was going through the best memories and striking scenes…

The morning I left her was steamy and dripping. She woke me early for one last time together. That made it difficult to leave I wanted to roll over and go back to sleep but no it was time to go on. We didn’t talk much as we walked down the soi and rode the song-teow to the bus station. I tried to cheer her up but she very emotional. I felt like I’d been waiting for this moment to come for so long but not in a nice way. Before boarding the bus for Bangkok we lingered in between two parked buses. “You know I don’t want to leave you” I said as I was kissing her, “it’s just that..” “Oh..Dave don’t make it harder” she was crying.

 

I looked at my watch a few minutes left till the opened the boarding gate. I walked over to a pay phone and dumped out the coins from my wallet. I fed them all in and called her mobile. “Hi” “Hey it’s me. Look, I don’t have much time on a payphone at the airport gonna be of in a moment..” I was rushing my slurred words out my heart was beating fast, “I just wanted to tell you again how much you mean to me..I ..really do..I love you..” “David..” “I’m serious..I do..” click.. that was it.

My heart fell down to my feet as I hung up. I went over to the attendant and handed her my ticket. She smiled at me as she handed it back. The walk down the box onto the plane was with mixed emotions but with a smile. Farewell Thailand, I’ll see you around someday…

kristinasub says:
whole soul in this blog ...
Posted on: Jul 05, 2008
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time to go now
time to go now